Busy At Home....

I watched a robin take advantage of the puddle I created while watering my garden. This little bird was grabbing from the puddle as many pieces of muddy, wet grass that it could hold in its beak at one time. I watched it return over and over to the same spot grabbing what it could. I told one of my children watching with me that this bird was wisely taking advantage of the helpful muddy pieces while busily preparing for little ones. The effort of this little creature hard at work building its home was endearing to me.

 

I reflected on how I treated our own nest. I could easily be lazy or overwhelmed within the same week. I did not pace my days in a healthy way or for the right end. I realized that I was sinfully working week to week for only the goal of earning my "well-deserved me time" rather than serving others. It seemed that children, work, school, and extra commitments were putting me further and further from that goal. I found myself cutting corners, letting things go, and complaining to others. As a result, I would be lonely, overtired, frustrated, and jealous of others who bragged about their own "me time." When I "won" and carved the "me time" out, it never really satisfied me and would be at the expense of others. So what was the problem? was it my scheduling? was I not working hard enough? did God love me? Oh, the foolish things we ponder during sleepless nights of child rearing. 

To get my focus off of me I remembered that God calls me to serve my home joyfully. We have six days to labor and do all our work and the seventh is our day of rest.  God gave us this plan and it is well-suited for us. This order of work and rest is for our good and His glory. 

When we gather as a people called into the presence of the Lord to worship, seek forgiveness, and be under the preached Word we come away truly refreshed and renewed ready to serve again.  This is a foretaste of glory. One day we will joyfully serve one another in the world to come. 

Proverbs 3:5-6 is displayed in my home to remind me not to make the mistake of working this out in my own strength. The Lord who created me and knows me is the one who will grant me the wisdom I need to use my time wisely. We grow tired, weary and worried with all the tasks before us. Sometimes we fall into a sinful habit of folding our hands and selfishly giving ourselves more rest and "me time" than was meant for us. Proverbs 24:33-34 warns us, "A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest, and poverty will come upon you like a robber, and want like an armed man." (ESV)

We as women are called to be busy at home.  Busy is good, but a busybody is not. A busybody is defined as a meddling or prying person. Why would we waste our time with that? That is someone who is not only tearing down her own home but the homes of others. Ladies, do not let this be a description of you. 

Proverbs also gives us no excuse to blame others for our own mistakes in keeping a home. We read in Proverbs 14:1 "The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down." These words cut me to the heart and called me to repent of my wrong doings. This is a sanctifying process that takes time and prayer. Each day was a new day to pay off the debt of my own work that accumulated from the folding of my selfish hands.

We know the Lord will bless us who endeavor to serve at home for His glory. He gave us our hands to work and our nest to keep. Take the time to pray for a heart that desires to obey the Lord and trust in His perfect plan. Feed on His Word and seek that wonderful forgiveness and grace that He showers upon those who repent. Pray for a heart that loves the Lord's Day and let your work each week be for Him.

Now off to my own nest...

Hosting the Weary and Broken Hearted...

 

As I was typing this blog there was a storm. The rains came down hard enough that my family paused what they were doing to look out the windows. None of us could have prevented this storm and for the most part we like to remind ourselves the benefits of one. The photo above was taken at a time when the storm systems approaching here were potentially more destructive. There was loss of life in our state that day and many are still cleaning up from the effects of it. So it is with the storms in our lives, we can not prevent them and they are there for a purpose. We need to be women willing to learn from our own trials so that through simple hospitality we can "comfort those who are in any trouble with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God" (2 Corinthians 1:4 NKJV) 

Your first step in this type of hospitality is to be a woman who knows the scripture. Recall the verses that were a comfort to you in your past trials and be ready to share them at a proper time. I do not usually quote poets, famous authors, or use the typical spiritual phrases people use when reaching out to others. I believe the best thing to say to someone undergoing a trial is, "I'm sorry." The second thing to say is, "I am praying for you." If you say the second one then be sure to do it. When I tell someone that I am praying for them I make sure that I do so right away. Persistent prayer and being under the preached word were two of the means God used to heal me during my own trials. As Christian women we are to be ready and willing to listen to, mourn with, pray for, and encourage other women in our circles who are in the midst of trials. Opening your home for an hour or two to chat over a cup of tea can be a benefit to a heavy heart. Your home with its normal routine and comfortable atmosphere may provide a welcome change of scenery for someone as they process their trial.

When we have moved and settled into a place, I looked for ways to keep certain rooms presentable and ready to host at a moments notice; our door has always twirled. As I told a friend once, "life comes to our doorstep." Paying particular attention to keeping certain areas clutter free and clean creates a welcoming place for your guests. Having four kids, our house twirls with activity during the day. For example, they can cover that coffee table with army men and game pieces, so we to stick to the rule "put away right away" when they are done playing. This makes it easier for us to be hospitable.

  

I love my hymnal and my psalter. There were times during certain trials that I found a particular comfort reading words from various hymns.  I encourage my friends to do the same who may be having a particularly unexpected or stressful trial.

 

When I was grieving during a trial I did not always have the best appetite. Sometimes I just needed to make myself eat something to feel hungry. I offer friends food that is simple such as soup or a light snack. Sometimes something sweet  helps to cheer a weary friend. 

Even my pets can help be a source of comfort to others — provided someone is not allergic to them.

 

I like having bird feeders in my back yard. Watching the birds come and go while we were going through the financial stress of seminary life helped to slow me down and remind me that our Lord  watches over even the sparrow. I would encourage my friends to slow down the pace in their lives, get in the word, pray, and be patient to learn what the Lord is trying to teach them. The same sovereign God that is watching over those little birds is caring for us.

Some trials are temporary and the storm passes soon enough. Others can last for weeks, months or years at a time and this calls for persistent prayer and a steady faith. Some trials are immediate and unexpected followed by a time of grieving. Whatever the form of these trials, if we have a desire to help one another, then we need to remember to listen, pray, and say "I'm sorry." By keeping our kindnesses tender, simple and sincere we show a respect to the person in need. They can cry it out, talk about it, even chat about it with no emotion — whatever  suits them best at the time. True friendship takes the time to listen and then endeavors to build trusting relationships by not sharing these moments with others. It is a privilege to be used by the Lord to help someone through a storm in life. The Lord himself promises in his word that one day He himself will wipe away our every tear.


"Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel." -Proverbs 27:9 ESV

Hosting Little Ones

 

  

I would like to offer some tips this week on hosting little people. When hosting I keep in mind that each child is a unique blessing from the Lord. They have their own personalities and should be shown the same kindness and respect that we want as adults. My goal is to make their visit just as pleasing and welcoming as it is for my other guests.  Having a simple routine and some items ready beforehand will help you host your young guests with a bit more ease. A good indication of success as a hostess of little people is that they do not want to leave your place when it is time to go home.

 

When I am hosting a group of children and their moms I serve a light meal or tea. While the children are occupied I like to be able to sit and chat with their moms. My goal is to keep the conversation helpful and encouraging. I try my best to guard the conversation from gossip and slander and look for opportunities to pray for the needs that are shared.

 

I gently welcome young guests who are first-time visitors. I show them where they can put their things, where the bathroom is, where they will be allowed to play, and most importantly where the toys can be found. Many children like to know if there is something to eat or drink and particularly what we will be eating. Once these items are covered I allow them to look around.

 

We have a shoe cubby to use when children play indoors. The shoes usually overflow to the floor in front of it when we have more children visit. This way everyone knows where to look for their shoes when it is time to leave.  The top of the cubby is where I put diaper bags or treasures that accompany my visitors. In the photo you can see it became a place for trays after hosting a larger event. 

I have kept or gathered items specifically to help with hosting younger children. I have a small table and two chairs, outlet protectors for the downstairs outlets, a booster seat with a tray, a pack and play with a crib sheet and baby quilt, spill proof cups, a set of dishes and utensils that are toddler friendly, a step stool for the bathroom, and a bin of baby and toddler toys that were favorites in our home. My favorite item is this Amish made stool. Sometimes a young child will sit and use the second part of the stool as a little table.

Children are, for the most part, easy to please.  I love using what I have at home for the purpose of play. I am known to run out to a delivery truck at a neighbor's house to ask for the leftover cardboard. A dress up bin of used clothes, a ready box of crayons, bubbles, blocks, and sidewalk chalk are some of my favorite items to have on hand when encouraging children to play.

I encourage healthy eating in our home. I am known to include fruits and vegetables when I host a meal. I cut up small portions for children who are old enough to eat a particular food. My snack favorites are pretzel sticks, cheese, grapes cut in half, mini carrot sticks, apples, and chips. Drink choices are usually water, lemonade, or apple juice because our homes have had light colored carpets.

Children who have been in my home will tell you that I have candy. They know where I keep it and they know I expect them not to help themselves. Candy is a treat in our home and given when permitted. I purposefully keep a candy dish out on my counter or on top of my piano.  I think it is pretty. Having a full candy dish as part of our decor has been helpful in teaching my children self-control. Yes, having an open candy dish while hosting has led to some funny stories. If the situation proved too difficult for a guest then I put it away during the visit.

I hope I have helped you to think of some ways to open your home to moms and children. We know mothers of little ones have schedules that can be tiring or lonely. Opening your home for a time of tea or a light meal where children are welcome and kept busy can be a blessing to all. We need to be good listeners who pray for and encourage one another. Hosting gives you an opportunity to do this. Take the time to think about and pray for particular women the Lord has placed in your circles. Pray for wisdom as you take the time to prepare your home for opportunities to bless others with your hospitality.

"Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones." -Proverbs 16:24 NKJV

Hospitality Begins at Home

Welcome to our home! I am going to start with a happy topic – food! Food and fellowship go hand in hand. Many holiday memories and family celebrations happen here around our table. My goal at home is to make these meals pleasant to the eye and palate.

Plating food has many benefits. It shows your family that you care about them. It also helps you reduce waste. You know your family and what each of them likes to eat. You can plate the food to their preferences and portion to their needs. When I can, I try to represent something from each of the four food groups. I serve a smaller portion of meat with a larger portion of sides because this helps our food budget. 

On special occasions we splurge on a treat such as the deli potato salad shown above. For holidays we budget for a larger meal and serve family style.

My inspiration for plating comes from visiting restaurants on my anniversary or birthday. I am known to have a camera on hand to take a picture of my food before enjoying it. I love a pretty plate!

I look for ways to add color to a dish. Here I added pineapple to our sliced ham before serving. Adding a dash of oregano or parsley to a dish when applicable can help make it look all the more pleasing. Paprika, dill, and cinnamon are my other favorites depending on what I serve.

I practiced plating food and table presentation when I was first married. It was just my husband and me, so there was no pressure and he was very grateful to me for going the extra mile. We couldn't afford to go out often so we made the practice of dinner dates at home. We still enjoy having special meals for two on occasion.

Dessert is always a nice way to end the day. I don't always do dessert but when I do I try to keep in mind our family favorites.

Tablecloths and centerpieces are the easiest way to make your meal time together as a family more pleasing. We enjoy candles at the table and keep them lit while we do family devotions. Even when my children were small candles helped to calm the atmosphere around the table. I would also play calm classical music in the background if the day had been a particularly stressful one for us all.

Your home is your haven and I hope that you will enjoy finding ways to make your meals a memorable time for your family. They will notice and appreciate the extras you do over time. Hospitality starts at home and your first focus is your family.

"Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fattened ox and hatred with it." Proverbs 15:17 ESV

Welcome to my blog...

This blog is for Christian women who would like some simple, practical advice or encouragement in the areas of hospitality and homemaking. I have asked women in my circles for some feedback on topics of interest. I will offer tips and advice that have worked in our own home through the years. I would like to keep this blog encouraging, realistic, simple and sweet.

Philippians 4:13 "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (NKJV).